I've sat through enough chapel speeches and church sermons in my life to know how the 'formula' goes:

1. tell a funny joke or humorous antidote about yourself to get the audience interested.
2. take that story/joke and explain it in some deeper, religious aspect. A good transition here would be: {audience laughter} "but on a serious note..." and then explain a deeper meaning.
3. Quote a bible verse. A well known verse such as Romans 8:28-29, Matthew 6:33, Philippians 4:6, and John 8:32 are always good ones. (and yes, I actually know what each of these verses say - and this is probably the first and last time I will ever quote Biblical references in here). The more verses you quote the better. You will look more authoritative if you read from a Bible instead of just quoting them aloud.
4. Tell another story about yourself, this time admitting some personal struggle you face. This shows the audience that you are just a humble human being on the same level as everyone else.
5. Quote the bible verse(s) again, but tie it in with your second story
6. Last but not least, make one more comment about your first story, just so as not to leave the audience on a depressing note.
7. Say a quick prayer.

There you go!! I swear that if you listen, you'll soon realize that practically EVERY sermon/chapel speech follows this pattern. Occasionally, step 1 and 4 are switched, but it's still the same thing. I just want to hear something different and feel as though the speaker honestly has a message to convey and is not just trying to impress the audience.

so, I did something about it. I spoke in Chapel on Mon. I'm probably the first person ever to not use a single bible verse in a chapel speech. And that's ok, because I didn't give a happy message about God either. I mentioned God, yes, but also hinted that when people say "oh, I just want to live for God and grow closer to Him"...that there is perhaps something else that we want when we say that. In other words, in so many words, I said that that phrase was a cop-out.

anyways, so I said some stuff and it was not quite the average speech - I purposely DID NOT follow the above pattern. It was great to get to speak - I'm not sure if I made anyone think from it, but I sure gained a lot by having the confidence to be different.

I'm just so ready to be out of here - although I really don't want to leave w/bad memories. 10 more days.

Chapters of My Life
Motherhood
Sept. 2011 - now Being a mother.
Isolation&Infertility (&pregnancy)
Aug. 2009 - Sept. 2011 Working from home in a job that I love...that comes with a loneliness I hate. A husband who works too much, and continued failure to start a family. Slowly spiraling, forgotten, into social invisibility. Accepting and experiencing the potential of pregnancy.
First-Year Teacher
Aug. 2008 - Aug. 2009. pretty much the hardest job I hope I ever have. and all the while trying not to admit my secret turmoil over longings for/attempts at/failure to produce what's supposedly supposed to come after love and then marriage...
Optimism
Aug. 2007 - Aug. 2008. finally accepting that becoming a normal grown up is not just inevitable, but preferable. better job situations for both of us. working freelance as a studio teacher, and becoming an egg donor.
Fading Dreams...
Dec. 2006 - July 2007. student teaching, being poor, consistent job rejections, trying to save face while feeling hopeless.
To Live a Life Worth Death...
July 2006 - Nov. 2006. thinking about death a lot, accepting life and my eventual end. career and passions - beginning the path of contribution to what I will leave behind...
Identity Crisis/Marriage
Oct. 2005 - Apr. 2006. new job. new career. new last name. new husband. new life. who was I and what was I becoming?
The Official End to Childhood? II
June 2005 - Sept. 2005. preparing for a life that still felt like pretend. was I really a 'grown-up' already? weird.
The Official End to Childhood? I
Feb. 2005 - June 2005. losing my virginity, getting engaged, changing my career, selling our childhood home...slowly losing everything that held me as a child... (Meet Mr. Mom 4/05 - 5/05. working/travelling on production of my 4th & LAST reality show ever.)
Quarter-Life Crisis/Unemployment
Sept. 2004 - Feb 2005. no steady job for 5 months - definitely not a good place to be. oh, and I fell in love - which is a good place to be, but it kind of only adds to the confusion.
Postlude to the Prelude
Apr. 2004 - May 2004. I had no clue what things were being set in motion...but everything has changed from there.
The Simple Life 2
Mar. 2004-Apr. 2004. not the deepest thinking period of my life, but I learned a heck of a lot about production of a reality tv show.
L.A. #2 - The Real World
Aug. 2003-Feb. 2004.the big move. transplanting my life. ironically not only working in the "real world", but also AT the company that makes The Real World.
That Weird, Here Nor There, Summer
May 2003-Aug. 2003. a college graduate, but not yet in the grown-up world. just existing. and waiting. and thinking.
Goodbye College
Jan. 2003-May 2003. it's a weird thing, the last semester of college. lots of thinking about what lies beyond.
The Semester From Hell
Aug. 2002-Dec. 2002. it was kind of like I tried to cram 4 yrs. of growing-up experiences into one semester.
I've Changed?
Apr. 2002-Aug. 2002. after L.A. and stuck right in-between the two most intense "finding-myself" semesters of my life!
L.A. #1 - Interning/Discovering
Jan. 2002 - Apr. 2002. I finally stepped WAY outside my comfort zone and went where I had no freakin idea what I was doing. Living outside your bubble for awhile really makes you see differently.
Beginnings/Depression
Aug. 2001-Jan. 2002. who I was, and sometimes who I still am. how it started and how it was before.