Friday, Aug. 08, 2008 7:59 a.m.

this is marriage

They aren't fights. They're 'discussions' where neither side makes any sense at all to the other and so both parties become frustrated trying to make their point become the most valid.

Even though the whole discussion is utterly pointless anyways. But each side just wants to be right.

K and I just got into this 'tiff' before he left for work just now:

K: I have nothing going on tonight after work so I can come straight home after work.
Me: Yay - I can make dinner; I want to fry some okra!
K: I thought you were going to go to our coffee shop early, get a table, and I'd meet you after work. Like we talked about.
Me: oh, yeah, I was excited about my okra *smiles*, but yeah, that's right. Wanna do dinner beforehand?
K: Well, it's probably better if you go early to get a table - isn't that what we talked about doing last night?
Me: Ok, I'll go to the coffee shop!
K: I think I'm gonna leave my laptop here and come back for it.
Me: You want me to take it when I go? So you don't have to stop by the house first?
K: No, I'll take care of it.
Me: You sure? It'd make more sense if I grabbed it so you didn't have to come home in-between.
K: I said I'd take care of it. I don't want to have to lug it to work with me all day.
Me: So let me take it.
K: Look, I said I'd deal with it ok?
Me: It just doesn't make any sense? Why do want to come home first while I'm waiting at the coffee shop?
K: Ok, fine, don't go early and we probably won't get a table...we'll just stay at home tonight. Whatever.
Me: That's not the point - do you not trust me to take your computer, cause that's what it feels like?
K: Look, I'll just take it, ok? *quickly and frustratingly grabs computer bag and packs it up laptop*
Me: K, I don't know why we're being like this, this is stupid.
K: Nevermind, I have my computer, ok? Aren't you happy - you win.
Me: How do I win? I wanted to be nice and take your computer for you.
K: Well, I wanted to leave my computer here and come back for it. But you have to question everything.
Me: Well, only because that doesn't make any sense.
K: Whatever, ok, I'm leaving. See you at the coffee shop.
Me: Ok, bye.

Then he leaves without the usual kiss, so I went after him and caught him at the car. Quick kiss, but then:
K: I don't know why you just can't let me take care of things.
Me: Ok, sorry, I'm not mad, I still love you, I'll see you later.
K: Fine, love you too.

Then he drove off.

Really - I still have no clue where that argument stemmed from. Does he feel like more of a man if he carries his own computer? Does he really not trust me with it and doesn't want to admit that? Was he annoyed that I was pressing the issue? Was he just late for work and wanted to argue with anything? Did he have something up his sleeve that he wanted to come home in-between for? Did he think he'd need to take a dump then instead of at the coffee shop??

Seriously, he could have just told me any of those things. Because now I'm all annoyed back at him.

uh - this is real married life. Good thing this, like so many other things, will pass and be forgotten before the end of the day.

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