2001-12-08 12:43 p.m.
things are so good!!
ahh!!!
Things are good right now!!Or maybe I'm just in a good mood, maybe things just happen to be looking up! Either way, I'm just excited about stuff! (of course, this could be just the next part of my little up-down cycle, but I don't really care right now! )
anyways, I saw Ocean's Eleven last night, got a free ticket too! It was such a fun movie! yeah, I mean, it was a fairly typical, unimanginative plot, but Steven Soderburgh did a good job directing it, plus Matt Damon, Brad Pitt, George Clooney and Julia Roberts helped out too! the movie calls for a bit of suspension of disbelief, but overall, it's a lot of fun!
I spent about 4 hours reading the end of Harry Potter: Goblet of Fire this morning. wow! so intense! it was great to go 4 hours of interrupted reading time, especially when it was such good reading! It's been only 5 weeks since I began Harry Potter, I can't believe I finished that quickly!! oh well, now I can start on Lord of the Rings (I want to finish it by Dec.19 - when the movie comes out).
I got a few emails this morning. One from my cousin who has some important contacts with stars in the Hollywood area and he's gonna see what he can do for me. How cool would that be to do ANYTHING film related next spring when I'm out in LA??!!
One of my friends is probably gonna be able to take over my apartment lease next semester! This was a huge issue that had not been taken care and I was stressing over, but it ssems to have worked itself out. And some other friends have an extra room they are gonna let me store my stuff in for free!
everything, finincal aid, student loans, insurance, classes transferring, it all appears to be working out for next semester.
Besdies the fact that I still have way to much to do (finals are next week and I have 2 huge projects still), I'm in a really good mood.
I wish I was always like this. I'm completely not thinking about the meaninglessness of life right now; that would depress me. But it's funny, 'cause I don't care so much right now.
Ok, well, I do need to go now. I really do have too much to do. I'm glad I at least feel like I have the energy to get it all done now! :)
Thursday, Aug. 03, 2017 - hello?Tuesday, Nov. 25, 2014 - strange dream
Monday, Oct. 06, 2014 - catholic and friends
Thursday, Sept. 04, 2014 - changing. and I need to go to bed.
Saturday, Aug. 30, 2014 - dreams of dying
Chapters of My Life
Motherhood
Sept. 2011 - now Being a mother.
Isolation&Infertility (&pregnancy)
Aug. 2009 - Sept. 2011 Working from home in a job that I love...that comes with a loneliness I hate. A husband who works too much, and continued failure to start a family. Slowly spiraling, forgotten, into social invisibility. Accepting and experiencing the potential of pregnancy.
First-Year Teacher
Aug. 2008 - Aug. 2009. pretty much the hardest job I hope I ever have. and all the while trying not to admit my secret turmoil over longings for/attempts at/failure to produce what's supposedly supposed to come after love and then marriage...
Optimism
Aug. 2007 - Aug. 2008. finally accepting that becoming a normal grown up is not just inevitable, but preferable. better job situations for both of us. working freelance as a studio teacher, and becoming an egg donor.
Fading Dreams...
Dec. 2006 - July 2007. student teaching, being poor, consistent job rejections, trying to save face while feeling hopeless.
To Live a Life Worth Death...
July 2006 - Nov. 2006. thinking about death a lot, accepting life and my eventual end. career and passions - beginning the path of contribution to what I will leave behind...
Identity Crisis/Marriage
Oct. 2005 - Apr. 2006. new job. new career. new last name. new husband. new life. who was I and what was I becoming?
The Official End to Childhood? II
June 2005 - Sept. 2005. preparing for a life that still felt like pretend. was I really a 'grown-up' already? weird.
The Official End to Childhood? I
Feb. 2005 - June 2005. losing my virginity, getting engaged, changing my career, selling our childhood home...slowly losing everything that held me as a child... (Meet Mr. Mom 4/05 - 5/05. working/travelling on production of my 4th & LAST reality show ever.)
Quarter-Life Crisis/Unemployment
Sept. 2004 - Feb 2005. no steady job for 5 months - definitely not a good place to be. oh, and I fell in love - which is a good place to be, but it kind of only adds to the confusion.
Postlude to the Prelude
Apr. 2004 - May 2004. I had no clue what things were being set in motion...but everything has changed from there.
The Simple Life 2
Mar. 2004-Apr. 2004. not the deepest thinking period of my life, but I learned a heck of a lot about production of a reality tv show.
L.A. #2 - The Real World
Aug. 2003-Feb. 2004.the big move. transplanting my life. ironically not only working in the "real world", but also AT the company that makes The Real World.
That Weird, Here Nor There, Summer
May 2003-Aug. 2003. a college graduate, but not yet in the grown-up world. just existing. and waiting. and thinking.
Goodbye College
Jan. 2003-May 2003. it's a weird thing, the last semester of college. lots of thinking about what lies beyond.
The Semester From Hell
Aug. 2002-Dec. 2002. it was kind of like I tried to cram 4 yrs. of growing-up experiences into one semester.
I've Changed?
Apr. 2002-Aug. 2002. after L.A. and stuck right in-between the two most intense "finding-myself" semesters of my life!
L.A. #1 - Interning/Discovering
Jan. 2002 - Apr. 2002. I finally stepped WAY outside my comfort zone and went where I had no freakin idea what I was doing. Living outside your bubble for awhile really makes you see differently.
Beginnings/Depression
Aug. 2001-Jan. 2002. who I was, and sometimes who I still am. how it started and how it was before.