Friday, Jul. 22, 2005 9:22 p.m.

one of "those girls"

so on my drive home from work today my mind randomly flashed back to a conversation I had with my friend and ex-roommate about a week and a half ago...

we were talking about something or other and then she suddenly said:

"oh my gosh, you're going to be one of those girls that've only slept with one man!"

like it was some surprising realization that spontaneously came to her.

and though I asked, she didn't really elaborate on what she meant.

hmm...one of "those girls". like I'm ultimately naive because my experience is found through only one person? like I'm missing out because I don't know the many different styles that different men could offer me? like I don't know how well I could be satisfied because I'm just being content in one man and one man for life??

is that what "those girls" are supposed to be?

I remember reading an entry from dannyboyk2 awhile ago. he used the illustration of ice cream flavors and how can we ever know what our favorite flavor is unless we broaden our horizons and try as many as we can...sure, we may be content in vanilla, but why settle for contentment when there's so many other flavors that might end up being even more satisfying?

(I think he was really using this illustration about religion or something and not the encouragement of promiscuity, and actually, I'm not even sure if it was dannyboyk2's entry, it might have been someone else�s...)

but still. it got me thinking.

on one hand, yes, I think that we should constantly keep learning and experiencing and expanding our basis for knowledge. we should try all the flavors in the ice cream shop � you never know, you may stumble upon something you like better. how can you ever really know if you�ve never known otherwise? you know?

but then on the other hand, I don�t think that�s right.

contentment in one thing and never knowing anything else does not lessen the level of contentment you experience in that one thing. if I liked vanilla and never tried anything else, I�m not losing the satisfaction I find in ice cream. in fact, I think if no choice existed between flavors of ice cream (like if vanilla was the only flavor ever created), that I would probably be more content than having as many choices as I do now.

each new choice is new opportunity for dissatisfaction. and what is it that what we want in life? to be happy? to be satisfied? to be content?

why do we then fight contentment?

yes, so I am one of "those girls". only one guy has ever been inside my vagina. I have only touched one penis. if he is vanilla, then yes, maybe I would like mint chocolate cookie more, but I�ll never know that�because I�m content with vanilla. and I CHOOSE to continue to find happiness and contentment in vanilla, and vanilla only.

ok, so I�m �na�ve� because I only know vanilla, but you know what? I prefer to be this way, thank you very much. and I�m glad that I�m one of these girls.

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