Thursday, Sept. 30, 2010 11:07 p.m.
understanding racism?
K was watching "The Pacific" earlier today and I caught a few minutes of it.
It made me think - were those American soldiers justified at that time in their deep hatred of the Japanese? When they came home from the war, and grew up to become our grandfathers and now occasionally utter things like "damn Japs" - are we supposed to deem them racist and assume that they are backward, or old-fashioned, or out of touch with reality? Or did they have a reason for these sentiments that we will never understand?
While I clearly don't have a reason to despise a person for their race or nationality (not to mention that I secretly kind of think Asians are the coolest)...I have to admit that I can understand why these men do have such hatred. And I can't say that I begrudge them for it.
When one country is at war with another country - and when the members of another country are aggressively killing not only members of MY country, but also my FRIENDS (pretending, for example, that I were a solider during WW2)...then I can completely understand.
Or rather, I can't understand. I don't know what it was like to be there. To be a target just because of the uniform I was wearing. Or to shoot at, and hope to kill, another person just because of the uniform they were wearing.
I would think that if I were in that situation that something would have to change in me...and that it would be perfectly acceptable, and maybe even right, to feel a hatred toward that group of people - a hatred based solely on that group's nationality...whose overall position was a hatred of mine.
Don't get me wrong; I am not advocating racism. All I am saying is that I don't think I can ever fully understand what many of the soldiers of my country have ever had to experience - and that I don't blame them for any possible lingering prejudices.
To be honest, I'm just so thankful that for hundreds of years they've gone out there to fight, and possibly die, for me...and that I just get to sit at home comfortably.
Thursday, Aug. 03, 2017 - hello?Tuesday, Nov. 25, 2014 - strange dream
Monday, Oct. 06, 2014 - catholic and friends
Thursday, Sept. 04, 2014 - changing. and I need to go to bed.
Saturday, Aug. 30, 2014 - dreams of dying
Chapters of My Life
Motherhood
Sept. 2011 - now Being a mother.
Isolation&Infertility (&pregnancy)
Aug. 2009 - Sept. 2011 Working from home in a job that I love...that comes with a loneliness I hate. A husband who works too much, and continued failure to start a family. Slowly spiraling, forgotten, into social invisibility. Accepting and experiencing the potential of pregnancy.
First-Year Teacher
Aug. 2008 - Aug. 2009. pretty much the hardest job I hope I ever have. and all the while trying not to admit my secret turmoil over longings for/attempts at/failure to produce what's supposedly supposed to come after love and then marriage...
Optimism
Aug. 2007 - Aug. 2008. finally accepting that becoming a normal grown up is not just inevitable, but preferable. better job situations for both of us. working freelance as a studio teacher, and becoming an egg donor.
Fading Dreams...
Dec. 2006 - July 2007. student teaching, being poor, consistent job rejections, trying to save face while feeling hopeless.
To Live a Life Worth Death...
July 2006 - Nov. 2006. thinking about death a lot, accepting life and my eventual end. career and passions - beginning the path of contribution to what I will leave behind...
Identity Crisis/Marriage
Oct. 2005 - Apr. 2006. new job. new career. new last name. new husband. new life. who was I and what was I becoming?
The Official End to Childhood? II
June 2005 - Sept. 2005. preparing for a life that still felt like pretend. was I really a 'grown-up' already? weird.
The Official End to Childhood? I
Feb. 2005 - June 2005. losing my virginity, getting engaged, changing my career, selling our childhood home...slowly losing everything that held me as a child... (Meet Mr. Mom 4/05 - 5/05. working/travelling on production of my 4th & LAST reality show ever.)
Quarter-Life Crisis/Unemployment
Sept. 2004 - Feb 2005. no steady job for 5 months - definitely not a good place to be. oh, and I fell in love - which is a good place to be, but it kind of only adds to the confusion.
Postlude to the Prelude
Apr. 2004 - May 2004. I had no clue what things were being set in motion...but everything has changed from there.
The Simple Life 2
Mar. 2004-Apr. 2004. not the deepest thinking period of my life, but I learned a heck of a lot about production of a reality tv show.
L.A. #2 - The Real World
Aug. 2003-Feb. 2004.the big move. transplanting my life. ironically not only working in the "real world", but also AT the company that makes The Real World.
That Weird, Here Nor There, Summer
May 2003-Aug. 2003. a college graduate, but not yet in the grown-up world. just existing. and waiting. and thinking.
Goodbye College
Jan. 2003-May 2003. it's a weird thing, the last semester of college. lots of thinking about what lies beyond.
The Semester From Hell
Aug. 2002-Dec. 2002. it was kind of like I tried to cram 4 yrs. of growing-up experiences into one semester.
I've Changed?
Apr. 2002-Aug. 2002. after L.A. and stuck right in-between the two most intense "finding-myself" semesters of my life!
L.A. #1 - Interning/Discovering
Jan. 2002 - Apr. 2002. I finally stepped WAY outside my comfort zone and went where I had no freakin idea what I was doing. Living outside your bubble for awhile really makes you see differently.
Beginnings/Depression
Aug. 2001-Jan. 2002. who I was, and sometimes who I still am. how it started and how it was before.